Pics!

First off - yay for minimizer bras. I have one on today and I must say it really helps. Prior to getting pregnant and have my boobs take on a life of their own and become godzilla-ish in size... I would have said "Be proud! Flaunt your assets! Don't hide them with a minimizer bra!".... I was happy with my double D's - sure they were big - but I could handle them. G's though? Another story. I needed some CONTROL!

Anyhow - sorry for the fuzzyness (and the trashy blue bra under a white top - I promise to change my shirt before I go out into public today!) but here are 'the girls' - looking like full D's in this bra if you ask me!.... I think my wide upper arms help to conceal how godzilla huge they really are (keep in mind my upper arms measure somewhere around 18" in circumferance!).

Here's another one ... belly. Looking at this pic I can see where my belly has changed a little. I seem to be popping out more right at the belly button level where I used to indent a lot more at that spot. I had the roll on my upper abs, then the indent with my belly button - then the huge pot of fat on my lower abs - affectionately called the buddha belly. Now I'm growing into one big roll. heh These pants btw are new ones I bought - 14 bucks at TJ maxx - they're deliberately big (Lane bryant's brand - size 20W). Without tying up the ties they're falling down on my hips - which is just fine. I should take a pic of me holding them up and out. I bought them big so I could 'grow' into them. I'm going to need comfy pants that aren't yoga pants! I can't live in spandex (I WISH).

Okay - on to the purses and shoes!!

These are the cream and pink Nine West leather mules - $18 - fun fun! I love the little kitten heels. Enough to make me feel sexy but not enough to kill my feet or calves (unless I'm power shopping in them).

I think the fun thing right now is that I can wear these. I think when I'm running around after kiddies or holding babies shoes like this will be relegated to special days, possibly even office days... but I won't be able to run around after the kids in any of my shoes like these! At least that's what common sense tells me!


These are the blue and white fabric Anne Klein mules - cute! I've been trying to be a bit more adventurous with color and fabrics in my wardrobe. Last year this time I wouldn't have even looked at these and probably would have said "ewww!". These definitely won't go with many things in my wardrobe but I have a few tops that might match, and I can always go with a monochromatic outfit and use the shoes, purse, and jewelry as the punches of color.

(damn I really *AM* watching these fashion shows too much! Listen to the stuff I'm spouting!)

Here's the white leather Anne Klein purse - This has a crocodile skin imprint on the leather which you can't really see in the pic. The shape is somewhat trendy - but not too far out - something I think that's always in style. The strap on the purse detatches too so you can make it into a clutch. The inside is a shocking green - but I still like it (odd for me). I got this one for $36 bucks - from what I can tell it would normally retail around $80-$100.



And finally - the Kenneth Cole wallet. This is really a deeper crimson red than is showing in the pics, I think the couch fabric and the flash are throwing the color off. Anyhow - lots of pockets in side but not too bulky (because when I add the cards and stuff in it always grows in size!) I have another red purse that matches this color almost exactly - So I can mix and match that wallet around with various purses. I got this for $18.00, the suggested retail on the tag says $60.00

I also bought a ralph lauren black leather wallet from TJ Maxx some time ago. It's such a nummy buttery leather too - I love it! And it's holding up *really* well. $30 bucks well spent! Unlike the faux leather stuff I've gotten in the past where the edges fray and the off color backing for the faux leather starts showing through at the seams, or the polish on the finish wears off and it starts looking really worn.

I don't mean to sound like some sort of fashion snob. This is really about getting more for my money than the labels themselves. I *HATE* buying something and having it wear out in a few weeks or months, and then buying something again to replace it. I figure why spend $10 on each wallet and have it last a few months (and then I put up with it for at least a year)... isn't it better to just save up and spend $30 bucks total on something that will last for a few years or more (and look good the WHOLE time)?? That's how I see it. It's more about quality than quantity.

It has to have quality though. I won't buy something just for the name if it hasn't got the QUALITY behind it. (back to my fabric purse comment).

And shoes - shoes have to be wearable too. I love the look of BCBG shoes. They're so adorable. They're leather and appear to be well made, BUT my feet KILL me just trying them on and standing in them (I think they're too narrow?)! I found several cute pairs in my last shopping therapy session, but I refused to buy them - if they hurt me just standing there in the store how can I even bear to wear them all day?? Scary to think what those shoes would do to my feet after one day - let alone a few years of wearing them.

Anyhow - enough frivolous fashion gab. This entry will fill this whole page in my blog - and push out the other more important post I already did this morning.... talk about fashion taking over! Work calls and I should find something to eat ;) Gotta feed the bean!

Feeling more relaxed today

Thanks to everyone who noted me.... Sarah and Janeen on the dopplar, and Mae on the shoes ;)

I guess I'm still a bit self conscious of my body... I so desparately want to look pregnant and not just FAT. The dopplar unit the doc used was a handheld one. She had a student/intern with her so I'm guessing it was a 'training' thing... but you know I would have expected better equip from the Mayo clinic! Who knows.

Not sure about the placenta - so far the only thing the tech's have said is that the baby implanted right at the fundus of the uterus. Textbook implantation lol - about the only thing my body has done 'textbook' style *laugh*

It was raining this morning so I copped out of my morning walk and opted for some extra zz's. I feel a bit guilty about that, but at the same time I know I need my rest now... and to sleep now cause I may not be able to after January! *laugh*

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More pinching pains last night.... not sure if it was the Bean or not. Maybe? Maybe I'm still just feeling the uterus stretch etc. I'm feeling much more relaxed after the ultrasound and seeing the bean in there moving around and the heart beating just fine. It's given me a bit more patience to just wait - I'm hoping I will *KNOW* when I feel it. And maybe getting to that 'no doubt' stage will take a while - and baby growing some more.

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I'll be announcing my pregnancy at work next week. Little nervous about that, but not really. I think I'm far enough along now that it's safe to make it 'official' by announcing it.

Of course work wants me to give them dates for my maternity leave. I think to myself "Oh yah - because I'm psychic and I know EXACTLY when the baby is going to come.... and as everyone knows baby's always come on their due dates" *note sarcasm*

They don't need this info until a month before I'm taking time off... so lots of time, but STILL.

It's a wierd situation because the customer I'm consulting at is much more laid back about these types of things... yet the company I work for is the one getting all freaky about dates. Doesn't the customer know best? *laugh*

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Big Hi to Mae!!! Neat that you found your way over here from Sarah's blog - I'll mosey over to your blog in a sec after I finish the entry - but to answer your questions.... I'd be totally thrilled with either. It's our first so there is a clean slate. I think I'm leaning more towards a boy - carry on Dh's family name that kind of thing... but a little girl would be SOOOOO much fun too. The first girl grandbaby in our family too - and that would tickle my parents pink as well :D

I'm happy with either though - I really don't feel like I'll be disappointed either way... after trying for a while and having PCOS and not knowing if I'd even be able to have my own kids - it was just a major relief and amazing blessing to get pregnant at all!


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Back to frivolous things - purses and shooooeeeessssss! - I have a tonne of other purses (lol just ask my husband) but in the past I'd always gotten cute (but cheap) purses - but they'd fall apart in a year or so. So I've really changed my thinking to get less 'super trendy' and more classic and long lasting purses.

I still have a few of those. Purses that I bought to go with a specific outfit etc. I've recently gotten into higher quality (usually designer) stuff. I can't stomach paying full price for it though, which is why I love this TJMaxx store... now I know not all of the TJMaxx stores are as good as this one... but still FUN! I'm a sale whore for sure! Now - I have to point out that I do'nt buy something solely because of the name on it. For example - I refuse to buy a fabric purse for an exorbitant price - regardless of the designer name on it. I love leather, leather lasts, it wears well, it cleans up easily.

I'll have to take pics to post ;)

Shoesssssssssss

Two new pairs of shoes (Anne Klein ... and - I think the others were nine west?) Both backless - or slides of sorts. One white leather trimed with a tiny pink scalloped leather trim. The other a blue and white woven pattern with a cute bow on the front.

cute cute cute. I'm becoming a shoe whore in my later days. Except... I don't want cheap shoes. I want NICE shoes. And I want them cheap!

I got the Anne Kleins for 18 bucks ($70 shoe) and the other pair for 20. Dang I wish I could remember who they were by - maybe they were both AK? no matter I thought they were CUTE and they were all leather - gotta love that.

I got 2 pairs of pants too. A white linen with some embroidery and shiny sequins on the bottom (not too much - they can be worn casual for sure). And a pair of chinos.

All for 58 bucks. If I'd had time I probably would have picked up a cute Michael Kors purse while I was at it - to somewhat match the blue and white shoes. I did buy an Anne Klein purse last week - weee! And a Ralph lauren wallet (that set me back 48 bucks if I remember correctly).

I know I should be a good mom and be saving this money for kiddy stuff. At the same time... I know I can afford to by this AND buy kiddy stuff.... and I feel like I should buy 'pamper me' stuff now because when the baby is here it will be MUCH harder for me(emotionally) to spend money on myself.


I've developed quite a purse array now. I have a nice black leather, red leather, and white leather purse. I think I'll probably buy one or two more - a nice tan or brown leather and maybe another color.

I definitely love leather. Nice leather too.

I think I've been watching too many episodes of "What not to wear" :P

Baby is fine!

Yay! Ultrasound and appt went well. They couldn't find the heartbeat at once (via dopplar). I was a little nervous so started cracking self deprecating jokes. Like... "It must be the pad of fluff I have built up" etc. After about 5 mins of trying (felt like 40) the OB gave up (she had an intern with her) and got out the us. That was a relief because almost immediately you could see the little heart beating in there (yay!!!!). Little guy was stubborn though (maybe it's a girl??) and had their back to the machine. The doc literally had to find the baby with the us - put her finger on my belly to 'place hold' the spot and THEN we could hear the baby's hb. *phew*

Damn that belly fat!! I didn't think I was THAT fat. In fact I almost got chastised for losing more weight.

See - now technically I haven't lost weight. In fact I've gained about 1.5 lbs. Which is *nothing* for my body. I gain/lose 3-4 lbs all the time ... it just seems to be water fluctuations with me... or how well my body has been eliminating waste.

The week that I tested I was weighting 226 lbs or so (nekkid at home). For my first ob appt (clothed) I weighed in at 231 I think. Next appt I was 226 clothed (maybe a lb lost if you discount the difference for clothing. Next appt after that - I was 230.5. This appt I was 227.5. So overall loss from their point of view was soemthing like 3.5 lbs but from my perspective it's a bit less than that?

Anyhow - I was actually expecting to to be MORE (be up from 230.5) because of the crap I've eaten in the last few weeks with this move. Nope. I"m oaky with it. I know I haven't had enough veggies and fruit in the last 2 weeks, but I've been eating ENOUGH food calorie wise. And I know that from here on out it will be better because the kitchen is now set up.

Anyhow - she of course asked me "Have you been eating healthy"? Which I responded to - well with the exception of eating crappy food like pizza and burgers in the last few weeks with the move yah - thinking she was talking nutritional wise. But I think her overall emphasis was more on how MUCH was I eating. *shrug* Either way the answer is yes.

I've been eating on average 300-500 calories more than I usually do. Even more with this last move. So I think I'm doing just fine. I'm definitely not trying to lose here, just keep the gain to a reasonable amount. I figure I have LOTS of time to gain weight. I'm not going hungry. I'm eating when I'm hungry etc. I should be just fine.

At any rate - it was a HUGE relief to see the bean wriggling in there.

Funny but when we were watching him/her on the u/s I said - "Are ya in there little bean?" and the baby raised it's hand! LOL! The doc laughed and said "Did you see that!? - it just raised it's hand!!" LOL funny. Just co-incidence I'm sure - but a fun coinky that will go into the baby book.

Didn't get a good u/s pic this time but I'll scan and post it anyhow in a few days ;)

I'm still alive

*chuckle*

Moving was and still is a pain in the ass. We've got most of the stuff switched over though. However, unpacking the sea of boxes continues. :P

Did I post the pic of the baby's last ultrasound? Not sure if I did or not

So here it is:


Isn't that nose CUTE!! I love looking at that pic. I hope I get a new one today.

Speaking of today- I've been nervous for the last few weeks... a few of my pregnant buddies online at the same stage as me are reporting feeling their baby move - the whole 'butterfly' thing. I've felt nothing. That is up until Saturday. Saturday I had a few wierd feelings in my stomach. Except they didn't feel like butterflies... they felt more like pinching - from the inside? Not really painful, just slightly uncomfortable. It didn't feel like gas? But at the same time I got them about an hour or so after eating tacos lol, and this morning after eating breakfast. So I don't know - maybe it IS just gas?

I'll mention it to the doc.

I know it's paranoid and I'm worrying uneccessarily but I've felt weird and worried in the last few weeks. I've had a few higher blood sugar readings with some poorer nutrition choices (a by product of moving and limited kitchen access)... and it's worried me. Like "what if I've killed my baby!" or "What I've done brain damage!?" - I know my highs haven't been atrociously high (ranging from 160-190) but they're HIGH for me. And with my nausea disappearing and my breasts becoming less sore - I've lost that 'pregnant' feeling. I still haven't seen any major changes in my stomach. However on the weekend I did discover that my lower belly area just below my navel is becoming harder and firmer to the touch. So maybe the baby and uterus is still expanding underneath my layer of whale blubber a small reassurance that everything is still all right in there. Like I said - I know I'm probably just being paranoid and worrying uneccessarily - and while I'm nervous about the appt today - I think it will reassure me too.

That lower part of my belly (and thighs and butt) are the major places that I gain weight. I've had that 'buddha pouch" like since FOREVER. I've always hated it. Even now I hate it because if I was more uniform in my fat distribution (or *ahem* had less fat overall - I can wish!)... I know I'd be seeing changes in my abdomen sooner.

I think the combo of everything, the move, losing my morning sickness, and no huge changes in my belly yet, and not feeilng the baby move - well they're all making me nervous.

Which in turn makes me nervous about this appt. I do hope the doc does an ultrasound. It would be really comforting to know that "The Bean" is still in there and wriggling around.

At 15 weeks preg the baby is now around 4 to 4.5 inches long. That blows me away... that something that big could be in there and I'd still not feel it... this whole process of growing a new life inside of yourself is totally and completely mind blowing. It truly awes me, and for once in my life I'm truly glad to be a woman. This is something a man can never truly experience or comprehend... something that is unique to women, and only to women. I'm not some huge feminist or anything but man there really are times when being a woman is a disadvantage in this world. This is definitely NOT one of those times.

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I'm hoping with the move mostly behind us I can get back into a regular workout schedule, even if it's just walks in the morning, and hopefully yoga every morning... I know my body could use it. I'm getting winded walking up stairs again... and I can't tell if it's just the pregnancy, or if it's me getting majorly out of shape. It's probably a little of both.

I haven't really gained any weight from what I can tell. I think I've lost some more muscle and it's been replaced by fat - esp on my legs and ass. i'm guessing I may have gained a few lbs since my last appt. That's fine if I did. It would be mostly baby and amniotic fluid I think (aside from the shift in body composition due to inactivity). I haven't weighed myself since before the move - so I have no idea if I've really gained a lot or not. This afternoons appt should be informative lol.

I know my prepreg jeans are still fiting me. A few shorts from last summer are too snug to be comfy when sitting down (pushing on the belly)... but they would have been snug with the weight I gained at the end of last summer anyhow.

Not much else to say... maybe a post later today after the docs appt.